Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
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DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
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I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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