i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
