So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
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