My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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