is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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