Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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