Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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