She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Randomize
