this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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