look no pants
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize
