hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize