are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
