I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
