: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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