some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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