I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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