Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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