No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Randomize