Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
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