i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
My ass is underappreciated
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
