It's Friday. Sex?
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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