We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
