No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
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