Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Randomize
