The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
