TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Randomize
