I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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