I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
