We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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