I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
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