just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
