It's like God shit irony all over that family
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
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