why didn't you poke me back
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
