North Korea, Best Korea!
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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