i permit you to call me
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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