dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
