He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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