I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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