I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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