Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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