Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did) http://tfl.nu/wp6c
  Replies (3) Good night (1421) Bad night (591)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads. http://tfl.nu/gq0b
  Replies (24) Good night (5397) Bad night (723)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous. http://tfl.nu/lqpw
  Replies (93) Good night (7289) Bad night (2008)
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (661): Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds http://tfl.nu/3651
  Replies (13) Good night (6462) Bad night (805)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (267): she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon. http://tfl.nu/y6s2
  Replies (11) Good night (3880) Bad night (1453)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit http://tfl.nu/yivm
  Replies (14) Good night (1242) Bad night (3727)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights http://tfl.nu/d3p5
  Replies (6) Good night (2146) Bad night (618)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think. http://tfl.nu/izcd
  Replies (3) Good night (1171) Bad night (612)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking. http://tfl.nu/nj2t
  Replies (5) Good night (1534) Bad night (556)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies. http://tfl.nu/fb0w
  Replies (2) Good night (707) Bad night (405)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that. http://tfl.nu/ketf
  Replies (10) Good night (2523) Bad night (471)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?

  (1-508): View more from Massachusetts

  the boozy kind. is there any other?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having? (1-508): the boozy kind. is there any other? http://tfl.nu/b6l8
  Replies (4) Good night (783) Bad night (312)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (701): And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold http://tfl.nu/d5yp
  Replies (8) Good night (1196) Bad night (325)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (212): He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch. http://tfl.nu/d4fe
  Replies (4) Good night (1776) Bad night (292)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee.... http://tfl.nu/ar4i
  Replies (2) Good night (256) Bad night (387)

Randomize