meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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