my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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