it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Randomize
