someone get that fucking seahorse.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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