you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
