I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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