i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
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