This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
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