Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
We have started to decorate penises.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Randomize
