i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
