I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
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Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
you never un-have a 4some
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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