I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
